Awkward conversations are like imminent train-wrecks.

It’s a vicious cycle. It starts like any run of the mill day at the local deadly railroad crossing—an amiable hello, a gesture towards conversation. And before you know it the trains are approaching from opposite directions and you’re this innocent 7-year-old in pink frog-print footsie pajamas and swimming arm floaties (of course) standing on the tracks looking each way back and forth frantically.

Left. Right. Left. Oh my God Right again.

You start trying to think of some elaborate plan to stop the catastrophic occurrence, some witty statement, some leading question, and by the time you realize that you’ve been reincarnated into a toddler standing alone in embarrassing PJ’s and obstreperous swim gear, you have no freaking clue how to save not only yourself but the desperate passengers along for the ride. The world is on your shoulders and then you hit the comprehension wall once again as you suddenly realize that in the midst of pitiful ponderings to prevent disaster, you’ve committed the worst mistake—you haven’t listened at all to what your friend had to say. The trains come barreling full speed with only the slightest flinch on the breaks from your futile attempts at saving this sorry excuse for human interaction and instead of an erupting collision it’s something worse.

Awkward silence.

Well, now I that I said it, I guess it’s not that bad.

Labels: awkward, conversations

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 13, 2007 at 5:58 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.